As with anything sexual, consent is crucial. If one of you isn’t into the whole clamp idea, nix it. There are plenty of other things to try that can stimulate the nipples like kissing, flicking, or pulling. And it’s also totally normal if you don’t like playing with your partner’s nips or having your nipples played with. But if you do decide to utilize clamps, then make sure to establish a safe word (like “pineapple” or “red”) before you start clamping all over. Since clamps can cause a bit of pain, paying extra care and attention to your partner’s needs is crucial.
Before just clamping away, clinical sexologist and cofounder of the Swann Center, Dr. Valerie Poppel, says it’s a good idea to warm up the nipples by kissing, sucking, massaging, or otherwise playing with the area. This helps get them aroused and ready for action. Next, you’ll want to place the “jaws” of the clamp on the nipple or on the areola, depending on what type of sensation you’re looking for. Finn recommends starting with the clamps at the back of the nipple (against the areola), since pinching the tip of your nipple right out the gate may be too painful at first.
Also, despite the name, you never want to just suddenly clamp the jaws shut. “Determine where you want the pressure to be, then slowly close the clamp,” Queen explains. Once it’s on, you can always adjust the tension accordingly. You can also try adding stimulation to your partner’s nipples while the clamps are attached, too. Pro tip: Close the clamp on the nipple while the wearer is breathing in, and let go on the exhale. This helps with that initial zap and gets the blood flow moving immediately.
Oh, and aftercare is also important, especially if sexual power dynamics are at play. Rub some ice, lotion, or aloe on your partner’s nipples after clamping, spend some time chatting or cuddling, and soak up those feel-good, post-banging vibes.
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